For a few years I flirted with yoga. I say flirt because it was inconsistent, it was fun and there was absolutely no commitment. I watched a few dvd’s, went to a few classes, and I even got a membership at a local studio. Even then, with my membership for a regular attendance at classes, my relationship with yoga was strictly platonic. It was totally friend-zone. I enjoyed it, it felt good, it was fun to be around but I wasn’t convinced it was “The One”. I didn’t even know what “The One” was or that I was missing something.
The studio I attended had teachers I enjoyed but I never felt like I belonged. I would show up for class, do what the teacher told me, roll up my mat and go home high on endorphins. It was great. At the time I was a young mom to two toddlers so anything that got me out of the house was a heaven sent.
Then one day absolutely everything changed. I saw a class on the schedule that had a cool name, the time worked, and I thought “why not?” The heat was off (“Thank God!”) and I mumbled along to something after saying a crazy long round of Ommmmmmmmmmmmmmmg (“Where am I?”) then the fun began.
It all happened so quickly I honestly don’t remember very much. I remember getting into Ardha Baddha Padmottanasana, thinking “OMG! Who am I right now?!? I didn’t even know this was a thing!”
When I say I don’t remember anything, I’m not lying. I don’t even know if I did full or half primary. The class was once a week, I went every time. I had never experienced anything like it before. The breath, the asana, the sequence, oh my god! The sequence! I had to idea about the tradition of ashtanga yoga. I just knew it felt like it was made for my body, and I was made for it. It’s like I was walking through life, surrounded by strangers, and then getting a whiff of your mother’s perfume. It was home. It was everything I didn’t know I needed. It was love.
Shortly thereafter I began my dedication to Ashtanga yoga. What was once a supplement to my flow classes became my main practice. I began studying the sutras, the lineage, devoting myself to the science of yoga. To me, that’s what Ashtanga yoga is, a science. The way Guruji designed the sequences is so perfect. Every asana builds upon the previous and up to the next. It invigorates, grounds and uplifts you in such a tangible way. It requires you to confront yourself, in a vulnerable state, and say “I am enough.”
I can’t imagine my life without Ashtanga Yoga. It has forced me to grow, to be humble and to believe in myself in everything that I do. I thank my lucky stars every day that I stumbled into a random class which has brought me into this lineage. I am home, and I am in love.